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Although she was active in charitable efforts, Astor also became noted for a streak of cruelty and callousness.
On hearing of the death of a political enemy, she openly expressed her pleasure.
When people complained about this, she did not apologise but instead said, " I ’ m a Virginian ; we shoot to kill ".
A friend from Virginia, Angus McDonnell, had angered her when he married without consulting her after having agreed to seek her permission first.
She later told him, regarding his maiden speech, that he " really must do better than that ".
During the course of her adult life, Astor alienated many others with her sharp words as well.

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