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Page "Lemmy" ¶ 45
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I and hate
`` I hate to leave my garden '', Gavin said.
You hate me, you hate my guts, because I like to hunt.
You actually hate me -- and we both know it -- because I killed that filthy snake.
I hate embarrassing silences and have been known to make a fool out of myself just to prevent one.
In that moment of vision Adam heard the voice within himself saying: I must not hate him, I must not hate him or I shall die.
I hate Warsaw, he said to himself.
I hate Poland and all the goddamned mothers' sons of them.
But now I think I hate it very much ''.
I hate it.
I hate it ''.
At another phase in the therapy, when a pathogenic mother-introject began to emerge more and more upon the investigative scene, she muttered in a low but intense voice, to herself, `` I hate that woman inside me ''!!
Naturally, the patient does not say, `` I hate my father '', or `` Sibling rivalry is what bugs me ''.
`` I hate to have these things come up again and again '', Dr. Jenkins commented as he made his suggestion.
In my mind, I began to review: his use of hate to gain support ; ;
I think that readers generally hate minute polemics and recriminations.
I love you, I hate you, I feel like killing you and myself, and in the same sequence I love you I think you're the most wonderful the most noble and so on and on, meanwhile eating a good breakfast and dinner and enjoying living.

I and idea
`` I arrived in the United States with the idea of establishing myself there more or less permanently and finding inspiration for new compositions ''.
I mean such concepts as the presence of the supernatural in human affairs, the sacraments of grace and divine retribution, the idea of preordainment ( the oracle over Oedipus, the prophecy of the witches to Macbeth, or God's covenant with His people in Athalie ).
I had no idea of what subjects one discussed when alone with a girl, or how one behaved: Should I hold her hand while walking or only when crossing the street??
When in one letter Jessica informed me that her father did not like the idea of her going out alone on New Year's Eve, I knew for a moment an immense relief ; ;
I wrote a few years ago that one of the cardinal rules of writing is that the reader should be able to get some idea of what the story is about.
In his analysis, however, he touches upon but fails to explore an idea, generally neglected in discussions of the book, which I believe is central to its art -- the importance of human hands as a recurring feature of the narrative.
`` I haven't the faintest idea.
I asked a silly question: `` You've no idea where your husband could be, now ''??
You see, I thought -- I mean I really had no idea '' --
`` Do you have any idea how far I travel every day??
Attending the life class was my idea -- or rather, Askington's idea, but I was ripe for it, and the other two wouldn't have gone if I hadn't talked them into it.
I was turning over the idea of a good debauchery when I dozed off.
My head was clear, my thinking sober and I was reconciled to this Paris idea as a flop on top of all my others.
I said with enthusiasm at the idea.
`` I had no idea that you, too, would be on this glorious voyage.
Lincoln rejected the idea, saying, " I will suffer death before I consent ... to any concession or compromise which looks like buying the privilege to take possession of this government to which we have a constitutional right.
Abby May described her idea: " I thought it would afford a daily opportunity for the children, indeed all of us, to interchange thought and sentiment ".

I and even
I wished to prepare myself but did not even know what sort of clothes I ought to be wearing.
`` I won't even try to thank you ''.
If I even hint at it do you think it will matter that you are his nephew -- and not even a blood nephew ''??
I don't even remember who wrote it but it was one of those 15th or 16th century poets.
`` But knowing you, I know that you're glad to be alive, and grateful -- and sorry because I killed the snake, even though I had to.
Dr. Lalaurie and I didn't even know he was in the house until the night of our ball when he came down the stairs ''.
They saw it before I did, even with my binoculars.
When I mentioned that for my first long voyage I did not even have the money for the return fare, but had trusted to luck that I would earn a sufficient amount, the young people looked at me doubtingly.
Others mentioned that I might have had to ask friends or even strangers for help and that to be stranded in a foreign country without sufficient funds did not contribute to international understanding.
I granted this might be so, but found the result to be even more attention to form than was the case previously.
Also, I am convinced that if my company were a sole proprietorship instead of a partnership, I would have been even abler to solve long-range problems for myself and my fellow-employees.
I do not suppose you ever heard of F. Scott Fitzgerald, living or dead, and moreover I do not suppose that, even if you had, his legend would have seemed to you to warrant more than a cluck of disapproval.
In any case, Miss Millay's sweet-throated bitterness, her variations on the theme that the world was not only well lost for love but even well lost for lost love, her constant and wonderfully tragic posture, so unlike that of Fitzgerald since it required no scenery or props, drew from the me that I was when I fell upon her verses an overwhelming yea.
Whether you experienced the passion of desire I have, of course, no way of knowing, nor indeed have I wished with even the most fleeting fragment of a wish to know, for the fact that one constitutes by one's mere existence so to speak the proof of some sort of passion makes any speculation upon this part of one's parents' experience more immodest, more scandalizing, more deeply unwelcome than an obscenity from a stranger.
You probably would not remember, since you never seemed to remember even the same moments as I, much less their intensity, one sunny midday on Fifth Avenue when you had set out with me for some final shopping less than a week before the wedding you staged for me with such reluctance at the Farm.

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